Before we went to sleep, she rolled over and looked down at me and said,"I'm glad you stayed over. It's been a while since anyone... well...it's just...been a while."There was still some aspect of Britney's history that I couldn't quitegrasp that Ally would have known. I resolved to read through Ally'sjournals this weekend so that I wouldn't be caught unprepared again.But I was able to return her sentiment at least and said, "I didn'texpect to stay here tonight, but I'm glad I did. Next time. “yes, don’t worry. I’ll be okay.” I smileagain. He leaves me to pull on my clothing slowly in the darkness to the sound of mellow jazz. I haven’t gone in forever. But I went last night. I was so sore. Laying down on the bed I was in pain. When he got into the room, he patted my back reassuringly and then adjusted the face rest. I was whimpering a little with the pain of laying so flat. He was saying, “it’s going to be alright, I’m going to try to help.” I was also laughing at myself, but I was. Some nasty looking storm clouds had moved into the area. I was freaked out, so I ran over to my Grandma’s house. Thankfully she was home.Looking back, I recall the pain mixed with pleasure so well. I wanted then to find out what the real thing felt like.I broke up with my second boyfriend just before summer. It was the night after my friend’s grad party. I was mad at my boyfriend because we hardly saw each other, and so I got really drunk. Next thing I remember, I’m trying to kiss my one. To pass the time, I read Chuck Palahniuk’s “Fight Club” and Joyce Carol Oates’ “On Boxing.” I even read a book by ex heavy-weight champion Floyd Patterson.Finally, stimulated by one of those ultimate boxing matches on cable, I took decisive action, and I went and bought a pair of red 14 ounce Everlast gloves with a Velcro closing on the wrists. I sent Mistress Victoria a polite email saying “the k**” (that was me) wanted a chance to get into the ring with the Champ (Mistress Victoria). She.
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